noun | fan toh·kuhns
Fan tokens are like the Beanie Babies of sports - they're digital collectibles that let you show off your loyalty to your favorite team, but they're also a speculative bubble waiting to burst. It's like throwing money at an athlete who's past their prime, hoping they'll return to their glory days.
Example
"I dropped $10k on a Paris Saint-Germain fan token because I thought Messi would take them to the moon this season. Now I'm holding heavy bags while watching Ligue 1 highlights on replay. At least I'll always have my digital scarf to keep me warm at night."
"Fan tokens are just another way for sports teams to extract money from their already broke-ass fans. It's like, 'Hey, you like our team? Prove it by giving us more of your money for this useless digital trinket! Dance, monkey, dance!'"
noun | faw·ling nahyf
A falling knife is like when you see your favorite shitcoin dumping and you think "now's my chance to buy the dip!" but then it keeps dumping and you're left holding the bag like a sucker - it's a market that's in free fall, and trying to catch a bottom is like trying to catch a, well, falling knife. It's a good way to get rekt.
Example
"I tried to catch the falling knife on BitConnect when it was down 90%, thinking it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Turns out, it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity...to lose all my money to a Ponzi scheme. Press F to pay respects."
"Trying to time the bottom on a falling knife is like playing Russian roulette with your portfolio - you might get lucky and hit the jackpot, but more likely you'll just end up with a hole in your head and an empty bank account. Don't be a hero, just wait for the dust to settle."
noun | feyk·out
A fakeout is like when your crush texts you "hey" and you think they want to hang out, but then they hit you with the "can I borrow your notes from class?" - it's a false breakout in a market trend that tricks you into thinking the price is going up, but then it reverses and reks you. It's like the crypto equivalent of blue balls.
Example
"I fell for a fakeout on the 1-minute chart and longed Bitcoin with 50x leverage. Next thing I know, I'm getting liquidated faster than a hedge fund in a bear market. Lesson learned: always use protection when trading, and never trust a green dildo."
"Fakeouts are like the 'Nigerian prince' scam of TA - they promise you riches if you just send them some of your money, but then they disappear faster than your hopes and dreams of making it in this clown world. Trust no one, not even your own mother."
noun | iks·cheyhnj
An exchange is like a digital swap meet for degenerates and gamblers - it's a platform where you can trade your hard-earned fiat for magic internet money, and then lose it all on shitcoins and margin trading. It's like a casino, but with more scams and less free drinks.
Example
"I signed up for a shady exchange based in Malta that promised 100x leverage and no KYC. Next thing I know, my account is drained and my identity is being sold on the dark web. Lesson learned: never trust an exchange with a name that sounds like a Bond villain's lair."
"Centralized exchanges are like the Wal-Mart of crypto - they're convenient, but they're also soulless corporations that will sell you out to the feds faster than you can say 'not your keys, not your coins.'
DEXes are like the farmers market of crypto - they're more wholesome, but they're also full of scammers and hipsters trying to sell you overpriced organic shitcoins. Pick your poison, fam."
noun | ee·thur·skan
Etherscan is like the Facebook stalker of the Ethereumblockchain - it's a block explorer that lets you snoop on anyone's transactions and balances, so you can see who's been simping on OnlyFans or buying drugs on the dark web. It's like having a crystal ball that lets you peer into the sordid lives of degens and deviants alike.
Example
"I spent all night refreshing Etherscan to see if my 100x leveraged long on a food-themed memecoin would pay off. Spoiler alert: it didn't. Now I'm living off ramen and cope while my wife's boyfriend drives a Lambo. Such is life in the crypto casino."
"Whenever I feel sad, I just go on Etherscan and look up Vitalik Buterin's wallet to see how much ETH he's holding. It's like a digital security blanket that reminds me that even though I'm poor as fuck, at least I'm not the one who has to carry the weight of an entire ecosystem on my skinny Russian shoulders."
noun | ee·ahr·see - twen·tee
ERC-20 is like the basic bitch of Ethereum tokens - it's a standard that defines how tokens should behave on the Ethereumblockchain, so they can all play nicely together. It's like the Pumpkin Spice Latte of the crypto world - basic, ubiquitous, and loved by normies everywhere.
Example
"I made my own ERC-20token called 'ChadCoin' that rewards holders with dick pics and protein powder discounts. It's like OnlyFans meets GNC, but on the blockchain. Get in on the ground floor before this shit moons, bro!"
"Every ICO and their mom was launching an ERC-20token back in 2017, promising to revolutionize everything from supply chain management to online dating. Turns out, most of them were just shitcoins with fancy whitepapers and slick marketing. Who could've guessed?"
A Bloom Filter is like a super-efficient spam filter for blockchain data - it's a probabilistic data structure that can quickly check whether an element is part of a set, without having to store the entire set. It's like a magic trick that can tell you if something is in the hat, without having to pull out all the rabbits.
Example
"Bloom Filters are used in some blockchain protocols to speed up the process of verifying whether a transaction output has been spent or not."
"The downside of Bloom Filters is that they can sometimes give false positives, saying that an element is in the set when it's not - but for many applications, that's an acceptable trade-off for the improved efficiency."
